Don't Mess with my Toos-toos

toos-toos - moped, scooter, generally for intracity use only

Those who drive on mopeds seem to think that they own the road; but then again, everyone here thinks that.
The toos-toos drivers are known to weave in and out of traffic, ride on the dividing line, and generally not follow any of the safety rules. Yesterday I saw one "go through a red light," by way of the islands, crossing 4 lanes of traffic, just before the light turned green. We, who drive defensively, have had 2 run-ins with mopeds; both of which were them running into us!

Anew

A new start.

We are moving at the end of the week, down two floors across the hall. There will not be as much sunlight or the spectacular view of the sun setting but we will be okay. There will not be fourth-floor weather reports in which I see snow flurries outside the window, knowing that by the time they descend 2 floors they will have become rain. This too is okay. There will not be intense negative energy or the smell of sewage from an exposed pipe or a "skylight" that is really a crack in the wall of the enclosed porch. Those details will not be missed.

I look forward to new beginnings and hope that my readership will visit us soon in #33.

Music MEME

The rules:

1. Turn on your mp3 player.
2. Hit shuffle.
3. Put the first fifteen songs that come up in a post. No matter how embarassing. No cheating!

I made an mp3 for my recent trip to the US entitled Rachel's journey. Here are the MEME results:

1. You Learn -Alanis Morissette
2. Once in a Lifetime - from the World Music Mix
3. Sweet Jane - Velvet Underground
4. Relaxation Spa Treatment- from the Wired CD (Wired Magazine)
5. Rain - Corrs
6. Your Song - Elton John
7. Right Through You - Alanis Morissette
8. The Memory of Trees - Enya
9. not the same- Ben Folds Five
10. Boadicea - Enya
11. Corner of the Sky (Pippin) - Jackson 5
12. fred jones Part 2 -Ben Folds Five
13. Into the Great Wide Open - Tom Petty and the HB
14. Im Ze Ha Sof - David Broza
15. One's Man Dream - Yanni

She is NOT Daisy

I found some not so helpful hints on 18Tricks2TeachUrBody, (whose link is now MIA, but that may be for the best.) It said that if I have to use the bathroom really badly, I should think about sex to alleviate the pressure. More specifically they recommended I think about Jessica Simpson. Now, not only do I have to urge to micturate, I also feel like throwing up.

Classic Moments in Shoedom Part 1

This morning on the bus the driver was playing a classical music CD. What a refreshing change from news I only generally understand and the same music "hits" played over and over again.

On the way home on the bus I thought of shoes I have owned. The painting bolted to the outer walls of the construction site on King George and the women who crossed the street wearing the skater sneakers inspired this stream of consciousness. I remember shopping for shoes with my Grandma at Buster Brown for each new school year. I recall giving away sturdy brown shoes to my friend Karen because I simply did not like them. Having owned many pairs over the past 25+ years (there were shoeless years too!), I feel grateful.

The MEME

7 Things I Can Do:
Procrastinate.
Cartweels.
Make challah (traditional Sabbath bread) and other breads/dough/pasta from scratch.
Mid-week crossword puzzles from the NYTimes.
Be efficient in my work, both time and production.
Spell.
Trouser Friendly Kisses.

7 Things I Can't Do (Can't is a strong contraction, don't or won't is preferred):
Don't :
Brush my hair.
Mop the floors.
Sing the traditional Ashkenazi Shalom Aleichem and Eishet Chayil on Friday nights. (The Wanetik Way pamphlet will be available soon)
Won't:
Take ANY medications unless I absolutely have to.
Throw trash on the ground especially when there is a garbage container 2 steps away!
Can't:
Drive a stick shift car.
Believe I should be shopping at the market now and instead find myself sitting here writing this MEME!

7 Things I Constantly Say:
I love you.
Sure/Okay.
No problem.
I love you.
When's Maariv? (Summer of 2003)
No Mom, I have a good calling plan and there is no need to call me back.
I love you.


7 Things I'd like to do in my Lifetime:
Have children.
Get my p'tor (exemption) from Hebrew and thus my MA in Religious Studies.
Buy a living space- apartment, house, etc.
Have a successful Healing Practice.
Write a few children's books and earn some money at it.
Make an artistic photo wedding album of our wedding!
Sew a T-Shirt Quilt.

Passing it on...

The Guinea Fowl and the Skirt

You may have heard that we were in South Africa for the wedding of friends. 'Twas true. We have returned.
and now a few words about international trade and how one never needs to leave home...

I bought a bordeaux (bordo) skirt in Capetown only to discover that it was manufactured in Bat Yam.
I bought a small model of a guinea fowl (the national bird and NOT Jerusalem Revealed's favorite) from a native artist only to find the same one decorating the window display of the bead store on the main street.

Though I have not yet conducted price comparisons, the skirt is probably cheaper over there and the same for the speckled fowl.

Stop by for your sample nougat and rooibos tea while supplies last.

The Nose Knows

This country has an obsession with bubble gum. Its scent is used for bathroom cleaner, hand soap, play dough and of all things, bubble gum! The fact that those items range from poisonous to edible is what throws me.
Ah, whatever. Just keep your tongue out of the W.C.

What's Ur Name?

Well, we have come full circle, haven't we? Not a reference to the holidays rather to email accounts. So many of us are jumping on the Gmail bandwagon and lo and behold we are using our own names in our addresses. First we were just numbers on Compuserve. Then, we came up with multiple creative screen names that revealed our secret selves to faceless internet buddies and hid our really secret selves behind other email identities. Some of us personalized our domains and put our real names on the internet map. And now we are being true...using our first and last names, and even middle initials on our own account. (PI)
So three cheers for you being you!
Unless of course you stole someone else's identity making it virtually impossible to forgive yourself, cuz who are you, really?

Berries and Summer Showers

As the case often is, when someone moves to a new place, they are asked what they miss from the old place. Well, I miss fresh berries (that are less expensive than 25 cents each), autumn leaves, and late summer thunderstorms. It is too early for foliage in NJ but 2 out of 3 ain't bad. My cleansing journey has been productive. So far I have sold some old costume jewelry for $30, rid my collection of hardly played CDs, and recycled 5 boxes (!) of old papers. I found 1 out of 4 yearbooks, my sticker collection from the early years, and 2 blue knit sweaters that will become part of my winter wardrobe. I have had some heart-to-hearts with family members and good friends. Next week I hope to continue the quest for some belongings. But no matter what gets sold, recycled, or packed in the suitcase - when I board the plane I will take the Bacon Bros. advice and I won't look back.

People I See

There are these people that you see all the time. For me it is 2 specific older women. I do not think they know each other or realize that I notice them all of the time - on the bus, walking on the main street, sitting on a park bench. One of the women has curly gray hair, the other a potentially chic cut of salt and pepper. Both are abit eccentric on the outside and since I feel a bit eccentric on the inside at times...the reflection makes perfect sense.

Smokin'

Robin William's character in Dead Again, said. "You are either a smoker or not. Find out which one you are and be that."
Today I saw a "smoker" and she so wasn't. I had a sense I should tell her. I didn't. I mean how would that pan out.
"Excuse me, you are not a smoker."
"&$@! off!"
I am not a smoker. But I can tell if someone is. I think this "gift" started after I saw the movie. Whatever.

Da Moon

Sometimes the moon really does look like it is smiling. I could be projecting but today I think it looks shocked. Its mouth is open and its eyes are astonished. The moon is not yet full; two and a half days until that monthly event. But what will the full moon bring? What will come to fruition by the shining moment of 3 stars on Saturday night? I hope it will be peace. Not of the worldly variety and more expansive than the inner kind, but peace nonetheless.

Torn

I used to work as a bartendress. At a certain point during that venture, I encountered a wedding guest who had brought his own G&T mug to the event. After maybe the 5th drink I realized I was in the wrong business. Why was I, a Pisces, employed in a job that supported addictions? We all have our vices. Mine are mostly food-related but I think they are under control. Either way I now find myself in a similar predicament.
I have a creative writing gig in which I must boost the ratings of internet sites that promote another popular addiction for some, a mere pastime for others.

Both last night’s repeat episode of CSI and a brief advertisement on Fashion TV (AKA the boob channel) are making me rethink my role in this field. On the other hand, creativity is what is driving me and maybe these stories will inspire me to write children’s books.

A class I took over 5 years ago, spoke of animal symbolism. When you see a certain animal/insect/bird/dare I say person, you should think about their qualities and why the universe allowed this interaction at this time. The spider has often made itself present at specific times in my life where my creativity was not being fully realized. The beautiful creature from yesterday met an unfortunate end; squashed inadvertently in the bathroom. She was not quite as large as Aragog but very much as dead. Do I read into this course of events as a sign that this brand of creativity should also be squashed? Or am I merely in the desert where spiders abound and TV has temporarily overrun my mind?

And why is a man narrating a tampon commercial?

The desert

Here we are at Mashabei-Sadeh enjoying the desert heat. I of course find myself inside the air-conditioned guest room (not quite like the hotel room of the US) watching TV on 50 channels in oh so many languages, creatively writing my short works (ask me offline and I will send you my best story yet) and calling Turkey of all places to interview someone for the August Livnot program. VH1 has by far been the most entertaining with 80's hits all the time. Why the TV obsession you ask? Because at home, we don't have a TV. In this country, there is something known as the TV tax. To a North American it is a completely ridiculous concept; paying the government for television in addition to cable fees??? That tax was just one of the reasons.
So now I have it on until the sun sets when yes, it's true, I will begin to read the infamous Book #6. A favorite joke of ours is of course a pun of sorts so I will close with it here in a slightly modified form...Why has it taken me so long to begin reading the book? Well, it is about patience. I wasn't rushing to read it, I'm Lithuanian.

nOWS yOUR cHANCE

oK. nOWS yOUR cHANCE. Please comment here on any or all of the blog posts. I know someone is reading them...

Thank you.

Grammar

Jew is not a verb. I resolve to take "gyp" out of my lexicon because it too is not a verb.
May we all emerge as non-judgmental butterflies...

Berries of blue

Fresh blueberries are here in Jerusalem! This is the first summer I have seen them for sale. For each berry, only 50 agurot (12 cents) What a deal! :(

Ribbons- Symbolic Representation

I have often considered myself apolitical at best, and some have called me ignorant (to my face) at worst. I do not participate in protests or parades that may have an explicit agenda (note: unless you think Memorial Day in the U.S. has an agenda.) However, this does not mean that I do not possess opinions. I merely (and merrily) choose not to choose sides. I will admit that I prefer to avoid conflict, but not at ALL costs.
The news is old by the time I read it and by that time, there is nothing I can do about it. I choose to focus on the comedy rather than the tragedy, on the wonderment rather than the dread, and life rather than death.
But here is a most interesting connection.
Ribbons are used to represent causes, both for and against (though not at the same time) :)
Living in a world where RISKTM is not just a game but a lifestyle, I find the original ribbon presentation http://www.generousgems.com/lg_whtribbon.jpg to be most appropriate for the cause.
Why? Because this runic symbol http://www.runemaker.com/futhark/othila.shtml means “Odal” or “Land”.
And the ribbon I wear proudly is :





I support chocolate.

Oh, the humidity!

Thursday afternoon, with assorted pitzuchim of the nutty variety, we drove up to Park Achziv for my cousin's wedding. I power-rolled my window down and said the title, in just that tone. There was a gusty wind though which made it all bearable.
The site as you can see was stunning. The cove as I will now describe it was surreal. The wedding as you could not possibly know otherwise was traif. We did not partake. And the whole experience impacted me in such a way that I dreamt I was eating fruits de la mer in Brazil nutshells and then fed them to my lover. Together in dreamland, we realized a most fitting verb for my actions - "eve-ing".

Quiet Girl

I was into gaming and now I am into quizzes...not really though. So what if this one is true.


Quiet Girl


What kind of little girl were YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla

א.ד.מ

I woke up this morning at 4 AM because I told myself I would.

The vamps at the lab wanted a piece of me. (Now makes sense... wait, …no it doesn't.)

For the first time in a long time, the vein was painlessly pierced, by a Transylvanian no less (though I can't prove it.)
Whilst wearing festive red in honor of the occasion, I carried on with the color scheme buying duvdvanim (only 10 NIS/kilo) at the open air market even though I had intended to buy tapuchim adumim. The crimson circle was almost complete when an uninvited pest-ette attempted to slurp vermillion energy out of my arm.

Red, the life force rooted in earth and humanity. ?

Beliefs

I believe in science. I believe in faith. I believe that humans have gifts, independent of time and space, in which the Divine is communicated. I believe there are true healers and that the energy is universally accessible through the proper channels. But one man's decree of the fate of someone's future is too extreme for my way of thinking. To rely on one person's prayer, one healer's touch or one shaman's craft is too limiting. And when that one person passes on to the next world, whatever that may be, all is not lost. Opportunities are everywhere. And a bit of faith & a bit of science oughta make it happen.

As an aside, my African violet is in bloom again!

"The Lion, the Wilco and the Wrapping Paper"

Where were we on April 4th? This entry will tell you about a assembloge [sic].

While surfing the web one day...and I am NOT a sports fan...Bad opening too contrived.

I really enjoy online games, particularly flash point-and click ones. I was "poking" around online and came across some flash experiments, as they are called by their creator. After testing out the experiments, I was led to his blog. On one of the posts (and he keeps a very detailed account of his day-to-day life, which is never boring), there was a poem. I wrote an email, "I noticed you had a poem by Yehuda Amichai in your blog." Then the disclaimer, " (I never do this kind of thing but I do have that spontaneity spark) Is there anything you want from Israel? We live in Jerusalem. My husband and I will be in the States next month and actually visiting Chicago."
Shout out to J. Botnick for driving us to movie theater and back.
And you can read Felix's side of the story here:

http://www.avoision.com/portnoy/2005/april/04.php

This one has a photo of He'Brew beer which was started by a past participant of Livnot U'Lehibanot:
http://www.avoision.com/portnoy/2005/march/30.php

Feeling 100 Shekels Lighter

I have made many notes on things I have wanted to write about but they remain...just notes. Today I bring you a tale of woe. I was swindled by a cab driver.
Maybe the details matter, maybe they don't. Maybe you have experienced deception, self -doubt, and the aftermath of trusting the wrong person. Maybe you haven't. Just remember this: Wear sunscreen.

Pleaches

Its the Road Trip themed vacation. Rent a car and visit 7 states and a district in 2 weeks.

Why is the plane scheduled to leave an hour earlier than originally planned? SO that it can sit at the gate for an hour and a half due to technical difficulties which I am sure were directly related to the limited movie selections.

How can anyone not bring provisions on a flight? Our passenger buddy (hardly) slept for most of the day flight and then looked at her manicured nails for 3 hours while waiting for a diet coke. Do those flight attendant call buttons actually work on El Al? Yes they do, but only when you have fallen back asleep. I then told the kind stewardess (can I write that without offending anyone) that she wanted a water. When Princessa awoke she drank it up. Hydration dear girl, and not teeth-eating acid juice is the way of the traveller.

Breakfast choices. "Eggs or Pleaches?" Ma? Of course I have had the peaches breakfast before but I had to clarify. What is it in Hebrew? "Blinches." Ah yes, blintzes. That word should definitely be taught at Berlitz.

On the road again tomorrow...

Wonder Woman

Okay, I can't find the article about Rabbis forbidding the wearing of the promiscuous color red. But that pretty much sums up their claim.

And now a heroine who wore red and some personal validation...

With the help of (way-in-syndicate TV shows) file sharing, we watched Wonder Woman. She is always saving the day. It was pointed out to me that some of her special powers are merely sound effects, but nevertheless I think anyone who can keep her bosom in a strapless super-leotard is a superhero. So this episode was THE episode. Hitler (yemach shmo) was cloned by a Dr. who specialized in regeneration. Anyway, the point is I had tried to explain to my Hebrew school class that this episode existed and they all laughed at me. (Did they think I nightmared that one up?) And behold here it was on our "TV".

For the record, we do not have a TV, nor a tuner, so the TV tax people should send their mailings to someone else.

Musings of the Week

Ants, ants everywhere...They are said to never cross a chalk line. So get your chalk out and draw the line.
Here's the problem, on which side do I draw the line? Maybe around myself? Or maybe around the whole darn building.

What I really want to write about (and I will) are my various musings. This time they will get on the blog before Shabbat. I even took notes.

Childhood foods. These past few days I wanted a Safta (grandmother in Hebrew) creation of sour cream, cottage cheese, and fresh fruit. I subbed yogurt for the sour cream and added a bit of maple syrup for the white sugar. Yummy. The drop in temperature caused me to seek raw sun rays outdoors. I set up on the stone wall out front of the apartment and ate my (lower in fat) delicacy. Mom called and I bookmarked my page. A gorgeous black cat asked to have some of the dairy treat. I obliged. A beautiful moment that spanned an hour. Dr. Dolittle, a man in orange doing Tai Chi near the far bench and a young boy doing imaginary work on the cement while his loving grandmother looked on. I looked up to the entrances and thought of SIMS. If I could control this building... for one I would not allow the downstairs neighbor to smoke in the stairwell or out her window or at all...only because it violates my personal space. More importantly though, if it were the SIMS, I would know what-the-hey the Thailandi neighbors are doing after midnight and every Friday afternoon, sounds like carpentry but I seriously doubt it.

Elevator Etiquette. So all this week I frequented an oblong elevator. How does one stand in one of those? It fit two people across and four people deep and there were only 2 floors! Did I mention the mirror? I took the stairs.

Men packing heat. It turns me on.

Next time:
Seeing the color red...

The Other Journal

I wrote 4 pages in my journal last night(!) when I couldn't sleep. I wrote about the state of things: my work, my moods, my fears and of course the weather. Why, praytell could I not write those innermost feelings to you out there in cyberspace? Because I knew it was passing, and well...suffice it to say that a pen with indigo ink and lined paper bound in a decorative cover is where the deep stuff can be safely stored.

I cried a bit the next morning and talked it out and felt better. Piped in music : It's All Right to Cry... (Free2Be)

And while my hands-on artistry is not sprouting, web links are ensuring that color and texture (albeit 2D), are alive and well. http://www.i-am-bored.com

I bring you... me, SP style.

Insomnia Artist 

A Day of Significance

'tis the last 20 minutes of that little known holiday(?), Groundhog Day. Of course, I celebrated by watching the movie of the same name. I really enjoy the movie, every time, no matter how repetitious it may seem. (And the report from Punxatawney Phil is 6 more weeks of winter! North America.) http://life.us.newsfutures.com/market/market.html?symbol=ESHADOWY

Today would be a great day to repeat over and over for some of us out there in Blogland and Bloglessville. Engagements, baby namings, and... our anniversary. Many ask, which one is it, because it seems as though we have been together forever,... in a good way. But it is only 1 year since the Wanetik wedding bash and our "10 years" worth of stuff on display and the toilet seat cover and matching bathmat would not support that reality one bit. The honey drizzle year has come to a close and we return to salting our Sabbath challah. But let a tear not fall, we have many simchas in this upcoming year and we will eat honey at their tables, or ours if they accept our invitations except of course for our vegan duo, maybe maple syrup is okay?

Today also has the opposite significance assigned to it, the passing of my cousin Menachem. I did not know him well but I know he was a great man. The extended family will come together tomorrow at his funeral. Births, bar/bat mitzvahs, weddings, and funerals- the life cycle. (There are also the "snipping"s but my endearing term didn't fit in that list.)

And so, we start off our anniversary day, Kaf Daled (24) Shevat, apart and come together to mourn for a passing while sharing life and our memories.

Then we will drive to Tiveria to relish in an extravagant anniversary meal courtesy of our Oregonian chum.

We will remember that we have reached this day in this land because of the sacrifices of our families. And we thank them.

a bit of time, a bit of space

What you should know before reading on...
1. The bus lines #14 and #18 share four bus stops on their respective routes.
2. This may not be my best work but makes an interesting point nonetheless.

While waiting at the bus stop for the #14, not one, not two, but three #18s passed me by. A lady got on one of them. I know this because the #14 finally arrived and three bus stops later, we picked her up again. I know it was the same lady because she was wearing a jacket that could only be described best by Troy, one of my college housemates, "Her jacket looks like a rainbow threw up on her!"

Are you following this?

So I thought, maybe she got on the wrong bus and asked the driver about her destination and he then told her to wait at this last shared stop for the line she needed. She was on the same side of the road so she gained distance. But she did not gain time.

I thought briefly about the relationship between distance and time but not for long because it was way too analytical for the midday moment.

Does this particular post need more explanation? Comments encouraged.

Circles with arrows

Recently, in many conversations with girlfriends, the subject of the book The Rules has come up. At least 2 of those who have read it say it cannot be erased from your mind once you have perused the pages of the dating guidebook. I have not read it, yet. Whether these gals speak the truth or not, I do not know, but they do know there is a price to pay for valuable personalized advice. http://www.therulesbook.com/#phone
You will be happy to know that the email consultations are more affordable.

I have been fortunate enough to conduct my own research on the male gender of our species. Just last night in my laboratory, a place where I like to mix a bit of this and that which results in a scrumptious foodstuff, two circles with arrows pointing to the upper right kept up insipid conversation, outdoing each other by claiming they "knew" why things were the way they were. All topics downspiraled to negativity until both parties were bashing organizations and systems and society and all else. Just short of peeing on the sturdy legs of the dining room table, the tomcats agreed to join forces against the world's imperfections. What a relief!

Unfortunately this battle and then surrender in the form of comradery, caused physical ailments for the circle balanced on an elongated plus sign, who in turn retreated to the bedroom for solace in earphones and the various late-night radio tunes. The dream world proved to be colorful yet again and continued into late morning. And the realization upon waking that both males had left for bread-winning, the baker smiled.

the Muse

In an interview about Shabbat, Emunah Elon spoke about the muse that made itself present from sunset on, causing creative thought and negating its being put to paper due to the prohibition of writing.

Before leaving for our Friday night meal, sitting in the dimly lit living room, I looked over and saw a glow emanating from the kitchen sink. At first I was mildly surprised but then quickly remembered- having heard horror stories about those who returned home to find a burned room if not an apartment attributed to the burning of the holy candles, I had lit the Shabbat candles in the sink. All is marble-topped and the windows are shut and there are no curtains in the kitchen but nonetheless, paranoia tri-decadia is setting in.

This is the debilitating disease that is for sure hereditary but really spreads environmentally or rather through nurture. It’s the over caring about the things that will inevitably go bump in the night. Teflon coated pans, tuna in cans, and attacks in the remote corners of shopping center parking lots. We don’t have parking lots of that size because our country is too small. Nevertheless I should not make light of the “dangers” that exist in the world.

For now, a search engine serves as my home page and I seek out the “facts” as I choose. The “news” will find me anyway whether I like it or not. And maybe I will gain a few more years of healthy living in the process.

and now a pocket warming story...

Imagine..Rachel at the shuk with a full-to-capacity cart of veggies and meat (in the raw) and fruits for weekly eating and a backpack, also fully stuffed, of herbs and greens for soup. Not so hard to visualize. It is Thursday and she wants just one more no fuss snack- Chinese Oranges (A.K.A. ripe kumquats). I pay the seller 7.40 and walk off, balancing my just bought strawberries on the fabric lid of the shuk cart so that I do not have berry mush when I arrive at home.

As I unpack the goodies and put all away in fridge and fruit bowl, no kumquats!

Fast forward to Tuesday! I go back to the seller and tell him that I was there Thursday and forgot my mini citrus there. He remembered! He then put 10 shekels worth of the little treats in a bag for me, because the price had gone up.

Ah these are the honest joys of memory! Or is it the memorable joys of honesty?